Vince Charming

Grave Measures

Click to hear a sample

VC: lead & harmony vocals, Mosrite acoustic, Fender Precision bass, Yamaha CS1 synth (organ & cello), drum programming; Angela Hessler: violin; Mike Grow: Fender "SRV" Strat

"Should I stay or should I go?” This question has been asked many times in song in many ways. I have always thought that music has saved me most times when I have sunk low, but I have also found that my sense of humor has done the job as well. “Why even try?” is the question I raise in the lyrics and that was the point I was at in the spring of 1998 when I met someone who captured my affections. I was so sick of the “F-word” when dealing with women. Yes, all you “nice guys” know it well. The word dreaded by would be Lotharios the world round: “friend”. Time and time again I had met women and bonded with them, only for them to say the just wanted to be friends. At this point what one of my professors in film school called my “wry sense of humor” took hold. Why not give it a go? More women friends will simply mean more mourners at my fantasy funeral. I wrote this song, quickly wrote the changes and had a new song for my solo acoustic act that was very different from many of the other songs I had written in that period. The title was the crowning piece of irony, for it came several weeks after I wrote the song bringing with it several new layers of meaning.
My rhythm guitar part, which so makes the song when I do it solo, practically disappears when we add Mike’s riffs and Angela’s great violin. I had always imagined something orchestral or maybe even a string quartet for the bridge. Right before Angela came over to record I wrote the “cello” part on the keyboard and recorded it. Angela then double tracked her parts and we at least had a string trio.

“Why even try?” he said
That little voice inside my head
“She’ll run away just like the rest
And put your patience to the test”

That voice and me, we disagree
About the way things ought to be

Chorus:

It might be doomed, but I’ll try
I’ll take the risk, I will be brave
At least there’ll be another friend to cry
Standing sadly over my grave

"She’s just friend", a tired phrase
I’ve been saying it all my days
I used to think I didn’t need more
Friends, that I had loved before

But for now I’ve changed my mind
I’ll take all the friends I can find

Chorus

I got this picture of a funeral scene
Women in black like some film noir dream
My casket slowly lowered down
Accompanied by the haunting sounds
Of moaning, sobs, shrieks and wails
From all the friends with whom love had failed

Call me sick, call me deranged
But for now my attitude has changed….

chorus

VC
3/15/98